Hang in There!
Hang in there. I know it's rough. Trust the unchanging God that has been with you through the good days. He's the same one that will get you through this. You don't have to say a word. He knows. He cares. He has compassion and understanding reserved just for your situation. He knows the details. He knows the who, how, when, where and what. Just give in to the need to be in control and let God take this.
Hebrews 13:8: Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
Malachi 3:6: For I the Lord do not change
Numbers 23:19: God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Isaiah 40:8: The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever.
2 Timothy 2:13: If we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself.
Isaiah 40:28: Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.
Do you believe him? Looks to me like he is trustworthy. Looks to me like I might just be safer with him than with anyone else. Looks to me like he isn't going anywhere.
I'm settling in today. I'm going to give him the things that I can't control, the things that concern and worry me, the struggles and sin I wrestle with. I need him to handle it. All of it.
He can and he will.