An ugly divorce
A cancer diagnosis
A wayward child
An adulterous spouse
An unimaginable deception
A broken friendship—
You fill in the blank with your heartache.
No one would choose these things.
But sometimes life, on its worst day, shovels a large lump of hard dirt our way. In those moments we choose how we will cope, endure, overcome, survive. We get to decide if the lump of hard dirt will be muddied and washed away eventually or if it will become hard soil underneath our feet, where we refuse to allow growth and new life. You may not have to decide today, but eventually everyone decides.
Growing in times of hurt, sadness and betrayal is difficult. Memories of better times, happiness and loyalty flood our minds as we recall the beautiful moments shared with ones we care about. It’s a struggle to make sense of what seems senseless. I admit to doubting God’s wisdom when he doesn’t intervene and make things better.
Grieving over disappointments and heartache never gets easier. It gets different. There will always be a part of me that misses my dad, that wishes I had made better life choices, that wants a restored relationship that seems will never happen, that cannot fathom why God has allowed terrible things to happen. But as time passes, I have seen how God has taken what I’ve considered devasting and debilitating and has done wonderful things. He’s restored, renewed, reclaimed. He has taken brokenness and put me back together. He has healed scars of emotional hurt and raised me up. He continues to work in ways I can’t even see.
And I know he will do that for you, and for me, again and again. So, I chose—to live and process grief and then to choose the pure Living Water to rush over my clump of dirty circumstances, and over time, clean me up. I may be stained, but useable. I may be worn and torn, but I have purpose. I may be patched and glued, but I am strong. Not because of anything I have done, but what Christ can do when we chose life over death. When we chose to see that the brokenness and hurt and heartache, while hard and difficult, can be used for a purpose in the future, we begin healing.
Job 5:9 says, “He does great things too marvelous to understand. He performs countless miracles.” After extreme loss and heartache, Job knew what we can know. God can take the worst and create something miraculous.
You have a hope and a future. Your life is a journey. How will you allow God to use the ugly and the difficult?